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Posted: Tue 19:38, 07 Dec 2010
Post subject: shirt Tiger is news conference expected to yield t
An equally intoxicated Gingrich spilled the beans concerning Friday’s festivities. Demonized by the media and scorned by his mistresses, forrests reportedly is in dire need to “tap some ass” after his recent Vanity just, impartial, unbiased, objective, unprejudiced,
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, honest cmore than produced absolutely zero takers. While it’s rumored across the Interwebz that forrests will be flanked by wife Elin Nordegren at the presser, Sportspoop has learned the four-time Masters champion has instead decided to be surrounded by his closest friends - Kobe Bryant, Alex Rodriguez and Christie Brinkley’s idiot ex-husband.
forrests is now expected to make one public plea for “poon” while holding the Vanity just,
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, which puts his erect nipples on parade. forrests also intends to show highlights of him playing his favorite 14 holes from around the world before firing up one smoke and falling asleep to bring the gathering to one conclusion.
Gingrich added forrests could also opt for “plot, scheme, design, draw, map,
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, biding apologies, etc. - but Ovechkin doubts the Stanford alumnus would take that course of action because,
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, “He’s one real horn-dog right now.” Michal Neuvirth who completed with 19 saves in his first start since Nov 20th against Philadelphia Fliers looked sharp as well in the opposite end. Although Dallas Stars did not pepper him with the volume of attempts that Washington fired in the other direction, Neuvirth used quality scoring chances efficiently and kept rebounds to a minimum as his teammates outshot the Stars directing 7 points in the first haft.
Close pal Bill Clinton was not invited because of his “thing for chunky monkeys,” Gingrich stated.
Ovechkin and the his team Washington Capitals did not see a referee emphatically signaling that the goal would not count. Their captain appeared to knock the puck past Dallas goaltender Andrew Raycroft to force overtime at that time. He had been ruled in the crease on the play when Dallas Stars defenseman Karlis Skrastins clashed with Raycroft.
Sportspoop website has uncmore thaned the inside scoop on Tiger forrests’ anticipated “press conference” he’s expected to host Friday morning. While engaging in one typical two- … uh, strike that … eight-martini lunch Thursday, Sportspoop’s own Rogue Palin bumped er, stumbled into fresh, unique, original,
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Speculation concerning forrests’ desire to play in April’s Masters also will be addressed. forrests will now announce he’s decided to forego golf’s Super Bowl and turn his attention solely to “scoring as much snoochie boochie as humanly possible,” agreeing to Gingrich.
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